What About Traditions?

"How did this tradition get started, you ask? Let me tell you... I don't know".

That may be my favorite line from Fiddler On The Roof but it reveals something important about how we view and participate in traditions. What role do traditions play in our lives and how much power should we give them over us? We are entering a season that is saturated with traditions and I think it is a good idea to take a deep dive into what we do and why we do it.

Traditions are very important. They tie us to history and to each other. They help us remember significant things and events. Plus, they are (often) a lot of fun! But what about when tradition becomes routine? What happens when, like the people in Fiddler On The Roof, we forget the why behind the tradition? Is the tradition even doing what it is supposed to do anymore?

I started thinking about this when we were discussing Christmas this year and then again when we brought up Halloween. For the past few years, I've been making these scrumptious cinnamon rolls for breakfast on Christmas Eve (when we celebrate Christmas as a family) and this year I cannot do it because of a commitment on December 23rd. My family was jokingly upset at "breaking tradition". But it got me thinking.

When I was very little, we would get up on Christmas morning, open gifts, go to church, and then go to my Grammy & Grandpa's house. I don't really remember it but it sounds hectic and stressful. So at some point, my parents decided that we would do our family Christmas on Christmas Eve. New tradition.

Maybe that first year or maybe later, we started the tradition of having Belgian waffles for breakfast on Christmas Eve. It's delicious but they are a lot of work. So a few years ago, I suggested that we do these cinnamon rolls, cheese, and fruit for our first meal, and move our Belgian waffles, eggs, sausage, and bacon meal to later in the day. Traditions changed.

As we got older, we stopped doing one of our Advent calendars that was geared toward young children. We used to get ornaments every Christmas from everyone (it seemed) and many people have stopped giving us ornaments.

Switching gears for a moment, let's talk about Halloween. As young children, we would dress up as Bible characters or "famous" Christians from history and we passed out candy with Bible verses taped to them. When my parents got tired of all that work, we switched to going to a hotel with a pool to swim and then watch movies and eat candy. That morphed into eating treats and watching movies in our basement.

I think you're seeing the idea. A lot of traditions have changed over the years. Does changing them mean we don't care or that the things we used to do aren't important? I don't think so. I think that traditions sometimes have to change as our lives change. I think it is a good idea to evaluate your traditions every now and again to determine if they are serving you or if you are serving them. Legalistic traditions don't help anyone. But chucking traditions out the door just because they are old is not the right idea either.

I think good traditions should do a few things:

1. Bring you joy and be fun to do.
   
2. Serve as a reminder or marker.
   
3. Connect you to each other and/or history.
   

If they aren't doing some combination of these things, it might be a good idea to pause and evaluate. Traditions that cause stress are ruling you. Don't be afraid to adjust or introduce something new if that is what works best for your life and your family.